The One With Shuura
by padme's sister
Summary: Mace tries to teach Padme and Sabe the improtance of what he calls a 'state of awareness called Shuura' whilst the girls are conviced its a fruit native to Naboo. Alot of fun ensues as they each try to prove the other wrong. FRIENDS adaptation
1. Chapter 1

**Author Note: Ok, I haven't done one of these for a while because I've been busy writing other stuff, but I was watching the FRIENDS episode 'The One With Unagi' the other day and thought 'thatwould be a great one to transform for my J.E.D.I series!'**

**So here it is. However, with a few differences to my last two versions...**

**1. There's no theme tune this time. If you really wanna read it, then you'll have to find my other stories.**

**2. I've cut out all the scenes that aren't to do with Mace, Padme or Sola because they're not as funny.**

**Enjoy!**

**Oh and sorry the chapters are so short, but I do a new chapter for each scene and some scenes are really short!**

In Dex's Diner on Coruscant, Mace, Obi-Wan, and Sabe were having lunch, whilst Anakin worked part time to earn extra money.

"Hey, remember when I had a Padawan?" Mace said to the group.

"Yeah," they all replied.

"Yeah, what, what was I thinking?"

Anakin picked up their bill and looked at it. "Hey! So, what's with the 20 percent tip? Did I do something wrong?" he exclaimed and the others stared at him in surprise.

"Twenty percent is a pretty generous tip dude," Obi-Wan replied.

"Y'know what's more generous than that! Fifty percent! Y'know what's even more generous than that!"

"I see where you're goin'!" Obi-Wan cut him off.

"What's up with the greed young Skywalker?" Mace asked.

"All right, look I'm sorry you guys, but it's just that I gotta get these new head shots made for the Jedi Temple photo board, and they're really expensive, y'know? I'm down to like three! Well, actually two 'cause one of 'em I kinda blackened in some teeth—Why did I do that!" He smacked his hand on his forehead.

"Well isn't there something you can do to earn a little extra money? I mean, can't you pick up, I don't know, an extra shift here?" Mace suggested.

"Or, y'know, I used to beg for money before Padme hired me. Of course it helps if you've got y'know a little of this goin' on." She stuck out her chest and shook it. "Wow! I still have it!"

"Oh, wait! Wait! Don't you have a meeting about an assignment today? Yeah! Maybe you'll get that job!" Obi-Wan said after forcing himself to look away from Sabe.

"Oh, ha-ha-ha! Ooh! Wait a minute, I used to get medical experiments down on me all the time!"

"Ah, finally an explanation," Obi-Wan commented and Sabe giggled.

"No-no! I used to get paid for all kinds of medical stuff, remember? Let's see. Ooh-ooh, maybe they want like some of my blood or spit or something, huh? Maybe they could make clones of me instead of that bounty hunter Jingle Fat or whatever his name is!"

"Anakin!" Dex said angrily as he walked over with an order on a tray.

"Yeah?"

"What did I tell you about talking to your friends while you're working?"

"Uhh...do it?"

"That guy..." Dexter pointed to a pilot in the corner "has been waiting for his coffee for ten minutes! He's complained about you three times!" He handed the coffee cup to Anakin, assuming that Anakin would deliver it and walked away.

"Well, where was I?" Anakin turned back to the group as he took a sip of the coffee.


	2. Chapter 2

A while later, Mace was still in the diner when Sabe re-entered, this time followed by Padme. Both were wearing workout clothes.

"Hey, what have you guys been up to?" Mace asked curiously as they sat down beside him.

"Ohh! We went to a self-defense class today!" Sabe replied excitedly.

"Wow!"

"Yeah, kicking a guy between the legs all morning really takes it out of ya!" Padme sighed, slumping into the chair.

"Takes it out of you?" Anakin laughed as he cleaned their table.

"Now, we can kick anybody's butt!" Sabe declared and Padme nodded in agreement.

"After one class? I don't think so," Mace snorted.

"What? You wanna see me self-defend myself! Go over there and pretend you're a serial killer! Go on! I dare ya!" Padme said, suddenly all flared up and ready for a fight.

"Well, of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming, that's not enough. Look, I studied kara-tay for a long time, and there's a concept you should really be familiar with. It's what the Jedi call..." he held two fingers to his temple and twisted them slowly as he said the word "shuura".

"Isn't that a kind of fruit?" Padme replied thoughtfully.

"No, it's a concept!"

"Yeah it is! It is! It's a fruit native to Naboo!" Sabe replied.

"All right, maybe it means that too…" Mace huffed, annoyed that he wasn't always right.

"Ohh! I would kill for strawberries and cream right now!" Padme declared, looking around for a menu.

"Y'know what? Fine! Get attacked! I don't even care!" Mace huffed again.

"Come on Mace. We're sorry. Please tell us what it is," Sabe said in a deapan tone.

Mace sat up straighter and leaned in excitedly. "Shuura is a state of total awareness. Okay? Only by achieving true shuura can you be prepared for any danger that may befall you!"

"You mean in case someone is trying to steal your fruit basket or your straw hat?" Sabe couldn't help but comment and Padme burst out laughing. Mace mocked her, then moved even closer.

"All I'm saying is, it's one thing being prepared for an attack against like each other; whole another story being prepared for an attack, I don't know, like a -" he turned and put his face close to Padme's as he screamed "Surprise!"

Padme calmly wiped the spit from her face.

"All right, you know that one was coming, but that doesn't mean you have shuura," he said, doing the finger thing again.

"Ooh! Y'know what? If we made reservations, we could have shuura in about a half-hour," Padme said to Sabe, who giggled again, but nodded in agreement.

"Y'know what…fine...go eat if you must! But mark my words...you'll need shuura after I've finished with you."


	3. Chapter 3

It was late evening and in the hallway between the apartments, Mace and Anakin were hiding behind a bump out on Yoda's side waiting for Sabe and Padme, who were going to visit Obi-Wan and Anakin. As they came up the stairs, the Jedi jumped out and cried "**DANGER**! **DANGER**!"

Both girls screamed and jumped away.

"Mace! Anakin!" Sabe exclaimed.

"What the hell was that!" Padme demanded, looking as white as a ghost.

"A lesson in the importance of shuura." Mace said, doing the finger thing again (which he's gonna do everytime he says the word now, just so that I don't have to keep typing it.)

"Ohh, **you're freaks**!" Sabe cried.

"Perhaps. Now I'm curious, at what point during those girlish screams would you have begun to **kick** our butts?"

"All right, so we weren't **pre**pared!" Padme snapped.

"I'm sorry we had to take such drastic measures to make our point, but we just want you guys to be safe."

At that moment, Yoda came out of his appartment to throw out the garbage and Mace and Anakin screamed…"**DANGER**!"

Yoda completely ignored them and kept walking.

"Ahhh, huh? Shuura!" Mace explained to them, trying to cover up the fact that his plan hadn't worked. Anakin was less good at hiding this fact and Padme winked at him to show that she knew exactly how he was feeling...After all, how was she to have known that a simple self defence class would turn into an ambush in the corridor?


	4. Chapter 4

Mace was in his own apartment later, having just come back from doing his laundry. He started folding it as Obi-Wan entered.

"Hey," Obi-Wan said as he closed the door.

"Obi-Wan. I sensed it was you," Mace said without turning round.

"What!"

"Shuura. I'm always aware," Mace explained.

"Okay, are you aware shuura (does the finger thing) is a fruit?"

"What's up?" Mace quickly changed the subject.

"I'm looking for Sabe. She said she'd visit me tonight, but disappeared a few minutes ago with Padme. They said they had something important to do."

"No sorry man. If I see her, I'll tell her you're looking for her," Mace replied.

"Thanks," Obi-Wan replied before leaving dejectedly. When the door closed Padme and Sabe jumped out from behind the curtains and screamed in unison "**DANGER**!"

Mace screamed like a little girl.

"Ahhhhh, strawberries and cream." Padme teased as she mimicked the finger thing.


	5. Chapter 5

Back at Sabe and Padme's appartment, both were returning from a shopping trip the next morning.

"Bail Organa?" Sabe asked.

"Yep!" Padme nodded.

"Ask Aak?"

"Oh, of course!"

"Orn Free Taa?"

"Definitely! Sabe, you will not find a Senator, who's butt I cannot kick."

They started to walk into the living room and noticed two heads sticking up from behind a chair.

oOo

Time lapse...

The girls had Mace and Anakin pinned face down. Sabe was sitting on Mace's back and arms while holding his head down and one of his legs, which she had twisted round the other.

Padme was sitting on Anakin's knees and holding his lower legs vertically, causing him pain. She'd also pinned his arms underneath him and was now in the process of yanking on each leg and causing Anakin pain everytime he didn't say what she wanted him to.

"Say it!" Padme demanded.

"Say we are shuura!" Sabe also demanded.

"It's not something you are! It's something you have!" Mace said as he wriggled and tried to get free.

"Say it!" Padme said again.

"Y'know what? I can easily get out of this, but there is a chance you can get very, very hurt!" Mace said, although he didn't sound so sure.

Padme yanked on Anakin's legs again and he groaned in pain, whilst Sabe twisted Mace's legs even more.


	6. Chapter 6

At a women's self-defense class, the instructor was just finishing a class.

"Okay ladies, that ends today's class, and let's remember, let's be safe out there," the instructor said to the group of women.

The women all clapped and started to leave as Mace and Anakin went up to the instructor. Apparently they had been hiding in the back.

"It's a great class," Anakin said to the guy.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, yeah, we were watching."

The instructor just nodded and walked away.

"Umm, hey, a couple of questions though. Umm, about that last move where the woman tripped you and then pinned you to the floor, what would you do next?" Mace asked.

"Well, she would take her keys and try to jam them…"

"No. What would **you** do next?" Mace said, pointing to the instructor.

"Who? Me the attacker?"

"Yes that's right."

"Why?"

"We tried attacking two women. Did not work!" Mace replied.

"What!"

"No, it's okay, they're our friends...I mean I'm even married to one of them!" Anakin assured him.

"Let me get this straight man, you attacked your wife!" the instructor exclaimed in disbelief.

"Oh, no! No-no! No, we **tried**! But we couldn't. That's why we're here. Maybe we could attack them together? You know, all three of us?" Mace suggested.

The instructor glared at him.

"That's a no then," Mace said, deciding to make a hasty exit.


	7. Chapter 7

Mace and Anakin were walking down the street outside Dex's diner and saw two women that looked like Sabe and Padme from behind.

"Ah-ha, nowhere to run!" Mace muttered to Anakin as they started to run towards them.

Inside Dex's Diner, Sabe and Padme were sitting up by the window because two guys had their favourite table.

"I don't like sitting up here! I'm just gonna go over…" Padme said as she started to get up.

"No Padme! They got here first!" Sabe said, grabbing her arm.

Mace and Anakin appeared at the window behind them crouched behind a garbage can and ready to spring their attack on who they thought were Sabe and Padme.

"Why are they doing that?" Sabe asked as they watched them run down the street and grab the women from behind, screaming "**DANGER**!"

"Oh my God! Why are they jumping on those women!" Padme cried.

"We should help them!" Sabe added as they watched the scene.

"I… Well, I don't think they need any help," Padme decided as Mace started to scream and run away, Anakin not far behind.

They stopped in front of the window to check the pursuit and noticed Sabe and Padme inside looking at them.

Mace mouthed, "What?" Then realized that the women they attacked were closing in so he screamed and ran away.

Anakin mouthed something to Padme which looked like 'You'll pay for this later!' before streaking off after Mace.

**End**


End file.
